


Red Like Roses

by J2R



Category: Homestuck
Genre: Alcohol (ab)use, Bullying, Child Abuse, Drug (ab)use, F/M, Humanstuck, Implied/Referenced Suicide, M/M, Suicide
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2013-10-12
Updated: 2016-07-11
Packaged: 2017-12-29 05:38:15
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: Major Character Death
Chapters: 5
Words: 11,840
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/1001645
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/J2R/pseuds/J2R
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>
  <i>Red like roses fills my dreams</i>
  <br/>
  <i>And brings me to the place you rest</i>
</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. Prologue

**Author's Note:**

> Something to know before reading this is that I'm not a very skilled writer and that I'm doing this out of my free time for practicing organization, writing, planning, and creativity. Please do not leave 90+% negative feedback, try to keep it along the lines of constructive criticism. That's always welcome and I appreciate it.  
> Thank you!

Everything in your vision is black. You’ve never seen anything but black. But something feels new, and suddenly the warm wetness around you is gone. You feel a rush of cold against the top of your head, and the rest of you soon after. You hear the muffled sounds turn crisp and clear, and every bit of it is overwhelming. You start to cry. You cry and wail and sob, louder than any other sound you can hear.

You hear something that sounds happy. Comforting to your ears as you are placed in warm arms from cold hands. But, just as quickly as it came, the feeling is gone. You open your eyes, and you see a smile, just in time for it to fade. Soft, blue eyes slide shut and strawberry blonde hair ruffles as the woman you see leans back. The steady beep, beep, beep you heard before has slowed to a constant noise.

You begin to cry again as you are shoved into the arms of a man, and promptly afterward, those of a child. He holds you carefully, taking you farther away from the comfort of the woman. He sits down and holds you close, rocking you back and forth with a low hum. It soothes you and you nuzzle your face against his shoulder. He smells like the woman, and his hair is just a bit more orange than hers. He feels safe. Soon, you fall asleep.

 

* * *

 

 

It has been three months since you were born. You never saw the woman again, but you keep waiting for her. You miss her, and sometimes you cry because thinking about her hurts. You don’t know why.

When you woke from your nap, you were in what you now recognize as home. Since arriving here, you’ve learned a few things. You respond to your name, “Karkat.” The boy is your brother, Kankri. The man is your father, Carmin. You’re not sure what any of this means, but you’re praised when you speak. It makes you smile and laugh. You like that feeling.

Today though, you’re sad. You’re unhappy and upset but you don’t cry. You keep quiet when your brother picks you up and shushes you, as he seems to do a lot. Your dad is yelling and throwing his arms around. You’re scared, and you bury your face in Kankri’s sweater. He still smells like the woman.

After a while, the door slams shut and your brother takes you to change your diaper. Now you start to cry. He frowns and shushes you again, trying to hurry so he can pick you back up and hold you close. When he does, he goes to wash his hands, then he brings you with him to the kitchen where he picks up your bottle and sits down to feed you. You sniffle, but comply.

You spend the night alone with your brother that night. It’s not unusual, but it feels different. In the morning, it’s also different. You had no idea that when you and your brother were walking out the door, it would be the last time you would see your home.

When you arrive at your godparent’s house, you are happy to find another little boy there to play with. In the next month, you learn that his name is Sollux, and that he is your friend.

 

* * *

 

 

You are eight years old. You have learned a lot so far in your life.

You learned that the woman you can still remember the face of was your mother, and that her name was Carina. You learned that your father was an alcoholic, and began “shooting drugs” after you were born. You learned that he hit Kankri and that your brother still has scars from it. You learned that Kankri took hits for you as well, and you learned that your father drove in front of an eighteen-wheeler on the freeway that night. He did it on purpose. Kankri says it’s not your fault, but you blame yourself.

You’ve also learned that your last name is Vantas. You learned that Sollux Captor is your best friend and you love him. He plays with you at school, and he even punched someone in the face when they pushed you off the swing. You still laugh about that.

You love to play videogames and computer games with Sollux, and you try to get Kankri to play with you as much as you can. He likes to play with you. It makes him smile. You smile too.

 

* * *

 

 

You are fourteen years old. You’ve learned a lot more since you were eight.

You learned that what your father did was called suicide. He killed himself because he fell apart after you were born. You still blame yourself for that, though Kankri insists otherwise. This usually ends with him holding you close and petting your hair while you cry on his shoulder. You couldn’t be more grateful for him to be there for you.

You’ve learned that school gets harder as you go along, and that your best friend has skipped a grade because he’s smart enough. You’re happy for him, but you do get bullied a bit more without him. You don’t mind. Another friend, Gamzee, has been helping you out. You like him a lot.

You’ve learned that crushes are stupid. You’ve learned that no matter how much you like a girl, someone you thought was your friend will snatch her away from you. You’ve also learned that using someone else to try and make her jealous is a bad idea and you should never do it again. That is, unless your face begs for another stinging slap and your crotch craves another painful kick.

You also learned what Kick a Ginger Day is. It’s a “holiday” that every teenager seems to participate in, and, unfortunately for you, the gingers in your school are literally outnumbered a hundred to one. Every year you come home and hide in your room until the bruises fade. It usually takes more than a week, but Gamzee defends you as often as he can. He sends someone to the hospital every year.

Despite all the downsides, you’ve been able to explore a bit. You’re a teenage boy; so, of course, you’re going to get curious. Your hands usually trail downward in the shower, and you couldn’t be more relieved that the bathroom in the basement where you, Sollux, and Kankri have your rooms is pretty soundproof. You’ve discovered that you’re rather loud, and especially vocal. You haven’t got much for stamina yet, but you’re hoping to develop that before anyone other than your hand gets intimate with you. For now, you’re content with yourself.

 

* * *

 

 

You are sixteen, and you’re starting to realize just how much highschool revolves around sex and drugs.

Gamzee has been smoking joints and pipes and hitting bongs since he was twelve, and it’s unclear as to if he’s been sober since. You were just recently informed of this by Sollux, who was higher than a kite at the time. You had tried to smoke it as well, to see what it was like, but you coughed and hacked after holding in a bong hit for six seconds. After that, you threw up, then dry-heaved for another half an hour. That was all you needed to refuse every offer of marijuana aimed your way from that point on.

To say the friends around you are sexually active would be an understatement. Gamzee sleeps around whenever he feels like it, and Sollux has been going back and forth between Feferi and Aradia constantly. He even had a pregnancy scare twice, after both you (hopefully) knocked some sense into him. You yourself, however, remain a virgin. If you said you didn’t wish that wasn’t the case from time to time, you’d be a liar, but overall you’re alright with it. The fact that no one has asked you (except Gamzee, but he doesn’t count) is a bit of a heavy foot on your self esteem. You try not to think about it.

You’ve discovered that nearly everyone you associate with is gay, bisexual, or pansexual. You have no idea where you stand.

 

* * *

 

 

Tomorrow is your eighteenth birthday. But today is your mom’s birthday.

Today is the only day of the year you’re guaranteed to cry.

It’s also the only day in a year that you ever see your brother cry.


	2. Birthdays

"We should leave soon," Kankri says. His voice is shaking already, but it still calms you. His voice has always had that effect on you. You nod, and wrap up what you’re doing.

Once you’ve shut down your laptop and texted Sollux to say that you’re going out, you walk out to your car. Kankri is already in the passenger seat, and he sits up and puts his seatbelt on when you close the door behind you. You put your own seatbelt on and start the car, smiling at your brother before reversing out onto the road and driving to the local cemetery.

Tears are already starting to form in your eyes as you walk down the path. By the time you reach the familiar stone, your sleeve is soaked and Kankri has started to sniffle. You both kneel and lay down the single roses you each brought with you beside the rose bush already planted there.

Roses are your mom’s favorite flowers. You love them too, and so does Kankri. Her favorite color of rose is red. Kankri gets that from her as well. You never liked the color red, but you’ve managed to convince yourself it’s your favorite color. It helps you feel closer to the woman who died giving birth to you. It’s faint and fleeting, but it helps you feel like you’re in her arms again.

"Shh, Karkat, it’s alright. She’s happy to see us, okay? Don’t cry."

You hadn’t realized that tears were streaming down your cheeks in a constant flow. You sniff and wipe your sleeve over your eyes, and lean against Kankri’s shoulder when he wraps an arm around you and starts to pet your hair. You feel like an idiot, but this is what you do every year, several times. Birthdays, Christmas, Easter, and a few more. You’re not sure why he only cries on her birthday, but you can see the tears start to roll down his cheeks and you hug him.

"I’m going to graduate this year, mom," you choke out. Kankri smiles.

"If he can keep his grades up."

"Shut up, I’m gonna graduate with honors you piece of shit. You just wait."

"That’ll be the day."

You slug him in the shoulder, laughing through your tears. He yelps but laughs back. You’ve both gone from sad to goofing off in a matter of two minutes and you like when that happens. It feels a lot less awkward to visit when you’re happy. You think it’s better for her that way, too.

 

* * *

 

 

It’s a few hours before you go home. Sollux, Dave, and Terezi have been spamming you with texts and you’ve got a full inbox when you get in the car. You brush off the messages, opting to read them when you get home.

The drive back is a lot longer than the drive there, understandably so. But when you finally arrive home, Sollux picks you up by tucking his arms under your armpits and using his height to his advantage. You try to kick and punch at him, but he doesn’t give. Finally you just give up and let him carry you to the basement you share and set you on your bed.

"KK," he starts with your nickname. You lift your eyebrow at him and cross your arms.

"What?"

"You have to stay in the house tomorrow, okay? Actually, stay in your room. I’ll bring you food and shit, just stay here, alright? It’s important."

"Sollux, it’s my birthday tomorrow. Why would I waste it holed up in my room?"

"Please?"

His lisp shows through. Oh no, your only weakness.

"God damn it. Yeah, alright. It better be worth it. I want some fuckin’ Alphabits for breakfast."

He smiles. Also your weakness. That goofy grin is too cute.

"Fuck yes. I’ll make sure we have some. You’re the best." And with that, he gives you a hug and a friendly kiss on your forehead before bee-lining it back upstairs. You just shake your head and pull out your phone.

Wow, you really do have a lot of messages. It looks like Jade texted you after you got home, too. You opt to check Sollux’s first.

 

* * *

 

 

hey kk.  
kk.  
kk??  
man where are you??  
you have two eiither come home or an2wer me come on.  
iit’2 iimportant, dbag.  
well. not liike liife and death iimportant but 2tiill.  
kk dude dv’2 tryiing two get a hold of you two.  
are you alriight??  
2hiit waiit  
fuck ii forgot where you were goiing  
nvm  
talk two you when you get home  
WOW, YOU’RE A FUCKING LOSER.  
2hut up go the fuck two 2leep  
MAKE ME.  
no iim not playiing that game wiith you jfc  
goodniight  
PUSSY.  
GOODNIIGHT

 

H3Y K4RK4T  
B1G D4Y TOMORROW HUH  
GONN4 B3 4 FUCK1NG BL4ST!!!  
K4RK4T >:?  
K444RK444T  
K44444RK44444T  
K4RK4T WTF 4NSW3R M3 >:[  
1 KNOW F3RG13 S41D B1G G1RLS DONT CRY BUT 1 JUST M1GHT 1F YOU DONT T3XT M3 B4CK  
H3R3 1T COM3S  
TH3 W4T3RWORKS!!  
OH NO 1TS SO TR4G1C  
SOLLUX TOLD M3 TO STOP T3XT1NG YOU WH4TS UP W1TH TH4T  
1S H3 G3TT1NG J34LOUS  
DO3S H3 TH1NK 1LL ST34L YOU 4W4Y FROM H1M  
TH4TS CUT3 4S H3LL  
3SP3C14LLY S1NC3 1 JUST M1GHT!  
H3H3H3 >;]  
TEREZI YOU NEED TO CALM YOUR DICK, WHAT THE FUCK.  
TH3R3 H3 1S  
M1SS 4M3R1C4  
MISS CANADA*  
WH4T3V3R!  
H3Y L1ST3N  
YES, NAVI?  
SHUT  
1 TH1NK YOULL L1K3 TH3 G1FT 1 H4V3 FOR YOU  
C4NT W41T TO S33 TH3 LOOK ON YOUR F4C3 TBH >;]  
OH BOY, IT FEELS LIKE CHRISTMAS. ARE YOU GOING TO GIVE ME A HINT?  
NOP3! H3H3H3  
AND THERE YOU HAVE IT  
NO ONE WAS SURPRISED  
SHH! YOULL LOOOV3 1T  
SL33P W3LL K4RKL3S!  
YEAH. YOU TOO.  
>:*  
*:B

 

karkat i swear to fuck  
if you dont get your lispy boyfriend off my dick in the next eight seconds im calling the cops  
like  
he wont shut up  
he keeps going on and on and on about how hes worried about you and shit  
everyone whos known you for more that five minutes knows you went to visit your mom  
tell her i think shes rly pretty btw  
tz showed me a picture of her she looks like she could be a model  
and not one of those anorexic ones either like the ones that actually look attractive  
not that anorexic people cant be attractive obvs  
and not that id like. hit on your mom or anything  
i mean shes attractive enough but  
wow look at that worded myself into a corner haha gonna backpedal this one  
so yeah sollux still wont shut up  
have you guys fucked yet?  
who boned who?  
i actually dont know who would have been the dom in this one tbh  
like  
hes all like aggressive with sex and shit but you  
youre like  
hyper aggressive all the time  
especially with him  
i bet you topped  
you put that fucker in his place didnt you  
you sly fox  
proud of you man  
finally swiping that vcard  
yo seriously though you should be back by now right  
shit brb bath time  
haha jk ill still text you in the bath  
want some pics of my sicknasty dongle  
DAVE.  
wow that got your attention  
NO. YOU STOP THAT.  
I DON’T WANT TO SEE YOUR DICK  
AGAIN  
again  
AGAIN  
oh shit yeah thats right  
lmao  
party hard  
SHUT UP.  
nah  
so did you and beeboy do the do  
NO.  
hella lame  
I’M NOT GOING ANYWHERE NEAR WHERE YOUR GROSS SCHLONG HAS BEEN  
hey now  
one time  
fuck a guy ONE TIME  
and it never leaves you  
how will i become prom queen now  
GOOD LUCK.  
thanks i appreciate it  
so how are you feeling  
FINE I GUESS?  
wrong answer  
you are PUMPED  
AM I?  
yes  
you are pumped as hell for tomorrow  
OK  
do you feel it mr krabs  
YES  
good  
then im done here  
later loser  
LATER

 

karkat!!!  
im so excited, i think i can make it to your party! :)  
OH MAN, THAT’S GREAT!  
yeah!  
gosh gosh gosh  
i hope you dont mind, i couldnt think of a gift so i made a card and put some money in it for you :(  
MAN  
NO  
MONEY IN A HOMEMADE CARD IS THE BEST GIFT FOR ME.  
WELL  
THAT AND YOU BEING THERE.  
YOU KNOW THAT.  
aw!  
karkat youre too sweet :’)  
I TRY (:B  
and you succeed!  
its a long drive to get there so im gonna turn in early i think  
make sure i have enough energy to party! :P  
HELL YEAH.  
AIN’T NO PARTY LIKE A PARTY WITH HARLEY  
hey!  
HO!  
hahaha  
youre such a dork  
YEAH I KNOW YOU ARE.  
listen here, punk!!  
I’M LISTENING.  
that was a bluff, i dont have anything to say :B  
INCREDIBLE  
ah!! shit i need to sleep omg  
stop distracting me silly!  
RUDE AS HELL. YOU BETTER BE ABLE TO GET HERE.  
pbbbtpbbtpbbbtpbtpbt!! of course i will.  
AWESOME. (:B G’NIGHT.  
goodnight!!  
see you tomorrow birthday boy!  
CAN’T WAIT.

 

* * *

 

 

You think she texted you back after that, but you already have your phone plugged in and set to the side of your nightstand. You can text her when you wake up. For now, you’re just tired and excited for tomorrow.

It’s a matter of minutes before you drift off.


	3. Choose Your Battles

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Trying to make the chapters a bit longer, unfortunately it's taking longer to do so, especially with schoolwork. Sorry for the delay!

"KK, open up the fucking door!"

You’re awoken by what you think is your head pounding, but moments later realize is a knee jabbing your door. You groan and turn over, pressing your pillow to the back of your head. You can still hear voices outside your door.

"Sollux, doesn’t that ruin the whole point of breakfast in bed?"

"No, locked doors ruin the whole point of breakfast in bed."

"His door isn’t locked."

You hear the knob turn and your door creak open. This is followed by an annoyed huff from Sollux and a quiet tsk, tsk from your brother before you hear him walk upstairs. You groan and turn back over, ignoring the mess of ginger hair in your eyes as you blink at Sollux. He has a tray with a bowl and a glass on it, and he walks over to set it in your lap.

"Happy breakfast; I made food," he says. In the bowl there’s Alphabits and milk, and apple juice in the glass. There’s also a piece of buttered toast, and a single rose off to the side. You’d laugh if you weren’t so tired. He really put a bit of effort into this, despite how simple it is to pour cereal and milk into a bowl.

After you eat your breakfast and text Sollux to come get the dishes, your morning goes pretty well. You put on the boxers from yesterday and pick out some fresh clothes, grab your phone, and head in for your shower. You put on some music— your Gorillaz playlist, to be specific— and turn on the tap, letting the water run and heat up while you throw your dirty boxers in the hamper and take out your earrings. You set them on the counter beside your contacts case, and pull the curtain across to step in the shower before you close it behind you.

The water feels nice on your skin, and you close your eyes and let it run over you for a minute. When you finally reach for the shampoo, your playlist has gone through two songs, and it goes through a third while you massage the soap into your scalp. You let it set there while you run the excess soap over your body; armpits, chest, arms, legs, feet, and your back. You clean your behind and crotch last, then stand back under the water to rise everything off. No one has yelled at you to get the fuck out if the shower yet, so while your hands aid the soap in sliding off your body, they trail downward, and you lean back against the wall. One hand wraps around your dick and you pull in a sharp breath, slowly starting to pump your hand. It’s a matter of seconds before you’re hard and able to move your hand faster, picking up at a steady pace. You let your mind wander, picturing a number of different people doing (for the most part) different things. It’s enough to get you to drip precum and cover your mouth to stop the moans while your hips jerk every so often.

You’re starting to feel the familiar tightness in your gut when it all comes to a screeching halt.

"Karkat hurry up, the bus’ll be here any minute!"

You swear under your breath, slam the water off and grab a towel, ruffling your hair with it and running over your body to dry a fair amount of the water. You turn down your music and plug in your headphones, letting it play through them while you get dressed. A pair of Marvel boxers, red socks, low jeans, and a Mountain Dew tshirt. You shove your phone in your pocket and stick a bud in your ear, then briefly look yourself over in the mirror. A hard swallow follows after your eyes settle on the obvious bulge in your pants. You glance at the door and quickly tuck your boner, rushing out to grab your backpack and hoodie, putting both on as you shove your shoes on.

"Bye Hannah! Bye Glen!"

You hear them both yell at you to hurry as you shut the door behind you. You have to run to get to the bus; it pulled up and stopped for Sollux just as you went out the door.

Once you sit down, the bus starts to move again, and you settle into your seat to try and catch a nap. You’re hoping that’s all you need to quell the heat in your crotch.

 

* * *

 

You’re woken up half an hour later by Sollux as he passes you on his way off the bus. You pause to look down and confirm that you’ve finally gone flaccid before you grab your backpack and get up, heading off the bus with only a couple students behind you. You walk into the building, and immediately you’re greeted with a hug from the side that knocks the wind out of you. The warm, familiar cackling confirms who you’re already sure the culprit is. You smile and drape an arm over her shoulders, starting to walk with her. She shoves her hand in your back pocket in return. You roll your eyes and head toward your locker.

"Happy birthday, honeybuns," she says with a low voice and pursed lips. You can’t help but laugh.

"Thanks, sweetiecakes," you murmur as you reach to kiss her cheek. You’re not actually in a relationship; it’s just a rumor that the two of you have been together since she broke up with Dave. Well, since the last time she broke with him. It’s going on two years and you decided over a year and a half ago to just go along with it. You’d be a filthy liar if you said you didn’t enjoy it either.

Once at your locker, you start to put in your combination, and Terezi leans against the locker beside yours’. She crosses her arms and grins, jutting her hip out as you pull a textbook from the top shelf. You glance over at her and smile back, laughing.

"Man, you’re more excited for today than I am," you say. She nods.

"Probably! I love partying, especially with my favorite Vantas. You gonna have anything to drink?"

You pause, running your tongue along the front of your teeth inside your lip, then shrug and shut your locker.

"Dunno. Maybe. Kankri might bitch me out if he catches me." A brief pause. "Which reminds me, you have to join me on drug control. The only one allowed to be high is Gamzee because I’m pretty sure he might kill someone if he isn’t." She nods her agreement.

"Yeah, alright. Get someone else on it too, though. We’re gonna be distracted for a little bit," she adds.

"Distracted?"

Right on cue, the bell rings, and in the span of time it takes you to blink she’s lost in the flurry of students that flash-flooded the halls. Ugh. You huff and throw your backpack over your shoulder, entering the crowd in the same motion. Of course, as you walk with one earbud in, you go to the wrong classroom and pivot on your heel to walk straight back out as soon as you realize it.

Despite your mistake, you make it through your actual class, and take another walk at recess. You’re a bit happier; it shows, too. You’ve got a bit of a hop in your step, and you’re bobbing your head to your music with your hands in your hoodie pockets. Your footsteps match the beat and you highfive Dave and a buddy of his as they pass. It seems like almost no time has passed before the bell rings again, and you decide to take the long way back to class.

The halls are nearly empty as you round a corner, and some guys come out of a classroom behind you. You pay them no mind; that is, until you hear them laugh over your music. You stop your rhythm and take out an earbud, turning your head just in time to get an aggressive slug to each shoulder and your back, one right after the other. They each draw an ‘oof’ from you. They laugh again.

"Stop tryin’ to be cool, Vantas."

Great.

"How about you go fuck yourself?"

A chorus of _ooh_ s rise from the other three boys. The one you snapped at walks up to you.

"What did you say to me?"

Your stare falters. This is a mistake.

"Go fuck yourself."

The late bell rings to break the silence. He jabs your chest with a finger and starts to walk off, still facing you.

"Watch your mouth, Vantas. That’s how people end up in bad situations."

You’ve turned around by the time he stops talking, and you bolt to your class as soon as you know you’re out of sight. Your heart is in your throat and you can’t focus for the next two hours of class.

After a lunch hour spent in the art room with Terezi and Gamzee, you read during English and right through your spare, jotting notes for the test on the book coming up. When the bell rings, you pack up your things and grab your backpack by the handle on the top, heading into the halls, then out the main doors.

You catch a nap on the bus ride home. This is going to be one hell of a Friday night.


	4. What's in a Promise?

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I can't believe it's been months, what the h*ck.  
> I've finally got the entire plot and series of events worked out, I'm so glad this chapter had what it did.

As promised, you stay in your room when you get home. All you did prior was go to the bathroom, and now you’re sitting on your bed with the Roosterteeth podcast playing on your phone while you grind some levels for the next gym battle in Pokémon Y. This is how you spend the next two hours, and after the podcast is over, you opt to have a short nap.

About an hour and a half later, you’re woken up by Sollux testing the speakers in the large living room. There’s a blast of “these blurred lines!” and it's instantaneously followed by loud footsteps toward the source.

"Sollux Captor, I thought you were better than that," your brother’s voice sounds. It’s like a knife. Luckily it’s not aimed at you.

"Better than what?"

"You had better not be planning to play that song. Do you realize what the lyrics even are? It’s awful, it supports ra-"

"Shut up, holy shit," he hissed. "Here, look; I deleted it from the playlist, happy?"

"Not entirely, no. But happier than I was.”

“Good, now get off my dick. I’ve got work to do.”

“Sollux fuck off, stop being such a whiny little bitch.”

As you get up off your bed, there’s a disgruntled mumble from Sollux at what Dave said. When did he get here? Oh well, doesn’t matter.

Kankri’s steps are nearly silent going up the stairs and you open your door, rubbing your eyes as you step out.

“Dude, no,” Sollux says, shaking his head. “We're not done yet.”

You just flip him off with a muttered “tough shit”and continue on your way to the bathroom, not bothering to shut the door before you unzip your pants to pee. You can hear Dave snickering and Sollux sighing, but ultimately ignore them both, finishing up and zipping your pants back up before you go to wash your hands. When you walk back in, you finally notice Terezi sitting on the couch.

“Fuck,” you groan, debating just going back to bed like Sollux wanted.

“Buenos días, muchacha latas,” Terezi cackles with a wave, and you roll your eyes before walking over to sit across from her.

“Where’s the booze?”

“TZ, get 'im a Breezer,” your friend orders dismissively. “We're not digging into the hard liquor yet.” She reaches beside her to grab the strawberry-flavored beverage from the cooler.

“Anything else, your majesty?” She laughs at Sollux as she leans forward to hand you the bottle. You take it and eagerly crack it open, downing a good amount with a tilt of your head. Despite being chilled, it starts that familiar warm fuzziness in your gut. You relax a bit and take another sip, then cringe at the sound of heels clacking on the floor upstairs.

“Are they not gone yet?”

“Have a good night boys! Don’t get into any trouble, love you! Oh, and happy birthday Karkat!” After that, the door slams shut and you can hear a car rumble to life before driving off.

“Never mind,” you mumble around the lip of the bottle before gradually drink in what’s left. “Yo Terezi, hand me another one.” She does just that, lifting an eyebrow at you.

“Man, at this rate you’ll be hammered before the party even starts.”

“That’s the plan.” With that, you crack it open and start on that one. Terezi just shakes her head, and gets up when the doorbell rings. Looks like the first car of people is here.

The parade coming downstairs consists of Gamzee, Vriska, John, and, oh boy, Nepeta. You briefly wonder who invited her, then clue in that means Equius- yep, right behind her. You force a smile and wave to them.

“Happy motherfucking birthday my up and best friend!” Gamzee grins and hugs you, picking you up in the process before plopping you back down on the couch. You laugh and let out a small breath when he sits himself down right beside you, draping his arm over your shoulders and nuzzling your cheek while he digs his bong out of his bag.

“No, no,” you start. “You get high outside, and before everyone else shows up, then put that shit away. Last time you had your group of drug addicts in here everything smelled like weed for a month.”

“Aw, shit,” he says. “If you say so, my wicked brother.” He gets up and heads outside with the bong, and Vriska and John follow behind him. You can’t be bothered to stop them, and instead slump back on the couch. You choke on your next swig of Breezer when someone bounces down on the couch beside you and jerks the cushions, and you sit up to cough and sputter.

"Oh! Oh no, I’m sorry Karkat, are you alright?" The faint roll of the r’s and high pitch here and there confirms that it is indeed Nepeta, and you clear your throat before responding.

"Yeah, I’m fine. Just," cough, "went down the wrong way."

"Are you sure? Do you need anything, or-"

"No, I’m fine. Don't worry," you insist as you shift to get up, then gesture at Dave; pointing to the floor. He smiles, nods, and puts on his headphones, booting up some music (see; Virtual Riot – Energy Drink) and distracting Nepeta long enough for you to sidestep your way out of the situation. Of course, you bump right into what feels like a concrete wall; Equius.

"Vantas," he rumbles, "I believe Nepeta was trying to talk to you. Don’t you think it’s rather rude-" He’s cut off by the doorbell and you take the chance to duck around him to head upstairs and answer it.

When you open the door, Dirk and Jake push by you with a quick “happy birthday Karkat!” each; they’ve each got three trays of food to set up. You turn back to see who’s left; Meulin, Kurloz, Damara, Aradia and, “Rufioh! How’s my favorite Hispanic at the disco?” He grins and returns your offer of props, and you give him a tight hug.

"Pretty bangin’, amigo! How’s the birthday boy? They get you a ginger cake?" You laugh and shake your head, and you stay upstairs with him to chat for a bit while the music blares in the basement. No one really came for you anyways, they just came for the food, booze, and the party itself.

 

* * *

 

An hour has passed and at least a hundred people must be here, you think. You’re edging on tipsy with two empty bottles beside you, plus the one in your hand, and you’re leaned over the counter in a bar stool while you will away the tiny pricks of arousal that rear their heads every few minutes. Alcohol always gets you worked up, and your mind wandering doesn’t help. Yet you never learn your lesson.

Rufioh left to head back downstairs, and a few people have passed you to search the fridge or use the bathroom. Every one of them wished you a happy birthday, some even twice or three times. You don’t remember who has or hasn’t. A couple knocks on the door followed by two rings of the doorbell get you to stand up and shuffle over to open it. You’re greeted with a tight hug and a loud, happy noise.

"Karkat! Happy birthday!" She sounds excited enough for it to be her birthday rather than yours. You hug her back with a grin, making sure to keep some distance at hip-level just in case. She holds your shoulders and gives you a kiss on the cheek, then pulls back with a toothy smile. You get a light feeling in your chest when you see it.

"Jade, I’m so happy you could make it," you respond. She bounces in place and reaches to tap your nose with her finger.

"I wouldn’t miss it for the world!" You know she’s telling the truth. It makes you even happier.

"Everyone’s downstairs," you begin. "If you wanna go down and see them I’ll be there in a sec. I just have to use the washroom." She nods and gives you another quick kiss, heading down the steps and into the flurry of people. Immediately following that is a chorus of people calling her name excitedly. You smile and turn your head back to the door briefly, then head to the washroom. You didn't actually have to use the bathroom, so you sort of stare idly at yourself in the mirror behind the toilet, screwing up your nose when you notice your hair is a bit fucked. Shrugging it off, you leave and wash your hands in the kitchen sink, then touch up a few loose strands (run your fingers through your hair once in an attempt to comb it) and head back out with a very minor wobble in your step.

When you make it back downstairs, Jade finds you and lets you know Terezi wants to see you in your room. You ask her to take over drug duty (assuming Terezi had been doing her job) and she accepts the task with a playful salute. You kiss her cheek and head to your room, knocking before opening the door and closing it again behind you.

"Terezi? What’s up, somethin’ wrong?" You ask as you look around for her, finding her sitting on your chair, wearing a skimpier outfit than she was earlier; a cropped tank and a pair of frayed jean shorts. You blatantly stare at her, sitting back with her arms on the rests and her legs crossed neatly. When you finally shake your head and look at her face, she’s grinning.

"Like what you see?" She asks. Your first reaction is to nod, but you stop yourself. There’s got to be some sort of catch to this, right? Like if you admit your friend is hot they never let you hear the end of it. She lifts a hand and curls her finger, urging you closer. You comply and she stands up, pushing you down in the chair and lifting a leg to set her heeled foot on the armrest. She leans her elbow on her knee and grins at you, taking out her phone and sending a quick text. The music gets a bit louder and everyone starts to cheer; she must have texted Dave. A few seconds later, the song faded a little early, and Hips Don’t Lie faded in to replace it. You can hear it as if you had earbuds in, and she licks her lips, stepping back and turning her back to you as she starts to sway her hips to the music. "Happy legally fuckable, Karkat," she muses, grinning over her shoulder at you.

You’re speechless. You just stare as she mouths the words and moves perfectly with the music, eventually straddling you and slapping your hand when you try to touch. Near the end of the song, you’ve got a bit more than half a hard on, and she leans in as if she’s going to kiss you. You lean toward her as well, starting to close your eyes before she puts her palm on your chest and shoves you back against the chair.

"Fuck, Terezi." Your voice sounds almost weak, and you can see her practically beam. She sits up on your lap, putting you eye level with a few inches below her chest, and scoots forward just enough so that when she sits back down, she’s right behind the tent in your pants. You bite the inside of your cheek, hoping she doesn’t notice, praying she doesn’t insist on getting closer. Of course, she does. She grinds the front of her shorts right against you, causing you to grip the chair and suck in a deep breath.

“That didn't take long,” she chortles, holding the back of the chair as she grinds you again. Her grin is as wide as ever.

“I can't, ah, help it.” Your face is burning, ears thumping with the blood pounding through them, and your mind racing. Is this what she meant as her present? Is she going to dry hump you until you explode? Is she going to get you to fuck her? You shift nervously and swallow hard, trying to go over in your head where you put the condoms you bought a while ago. Shit, what was the expiry date again? Were they even still usable? A brief flash of panic crosses your face before you force yourself to calm down. You don't think you're ready to be needing those, and you know she'll understand if she tries and you ask her to stop. Knowing her, she'd be just as happy doing something else.

You're dragged from your thoughts as she starts swaying and jutting her hips to the music again, sure to give you attention here and there as she moves. Every curve, every smooth angle, every slide of her skin is hypnotizing. She eventually keeps you at eye level with her chest, grinning down at the dumb look on your face. You close your mouth after a few seconds (when did you open it?) and swallow, reaching up with shaky hands to rest them on her sides, a few inches below. The touch was met with another harsh slap that made you jump and hiss, looking at her with a shy expression.

“Don't touch,” was her simple response.

Yeah, you may have forgotten about that.

Her lap dance carried on until the end of the song and half way through the next one, and by now your erection was aching and desperately begging for more attention than a beautiful body to stare at, and just a few brushes against the top two inches through denim. You wouldn't dare stop her, especially just to go jerk off. You were having the time of your life.

Then, she slipped off your lap and off the chair, and rested on her knees on the floor in front of you. You move to sit forward, curiously watching her, but she scoots closer and pushes you back again with one hand on your chest. Sitting back again, you freeze, watching her skillfully undo the button on your jeans and lean forward to take the zipper pull in her teeth. You're fully expecting this to be awkward, but she smoothly brings it down, and you involuntarily sigh with relief. Your half-lidded eyes close with a sharp breath as she kisses your tip through your precum-soaked boxers, and her eyes peek over the rims of the tinted glasses you just now noticed she's still wearing.

“I wanna suck your dick so fucking bad.”

“Please,” you don't even remember opening your mouth, “fuck, Terezi, please.”

She smiles and pulls your boxers down, resting the elastic just below the base and covering your balls. You can't help but to stare, sinking into your seat when you see her face drop a little. Shit, she doesn't like it. You're fucked you're so fucked you're a freak.

“You're bigger than I thought you'd be, holy shit.”

Oh. Okay.

Relaxing, you murmur something you're not even sure of and she seems to ignore it, probably for the best. She rubs some of the precum from your tip down your length, taking it in her hand and tilting it just enough to the side so she can lean in and, painstakingly slowly, lick up the other side. It takes all you've got not to blow right there, but you know you're probably not going to last as long as she would have hoped.

Regardless, she takes the head in her mouth, sucking hard and causing your jaw to drop open. You curse and say her name, over and over, as if following a pattern. She bobs her head, taking half an inch more of your cock each time she goes down. It's too much, and you bury your hand in her hair, warning her that you're going to cum. She hums and you can feel her try to smile, and she quickly takes you to the base before slowly sucking her way back to the tip and letting go with a loud _pop_. She jerks you with her hand, once, twice, and you're gone, lifting your hips and gripping the arm of the chair with your mouth hung open in a silent scream. When you stop seeing spots and look down, she's got her phone out, taking a picture of her face with your spunk in ropes over her lips, nose, and chin. You'll have to ask her for a copy of it later because holy _shit_ you never appreciated cum on someone's face until it was your own.

When she's done, she looks at you and draws her tongue up your head to get the little bit left behind, then licks her lips of what she can reach. She wipes the rest off with her fingers and sucks it off. All you can do is just tilt your head back again and try to finally even out your breathing.

 

* * *

 

You wake with a start as an alarm clock is held by your ear, sitting up and whacking your forehead off the edge of the coffee table.

“Shit- fuck, what the fuck,” you snarl, blindly swiping at the source with a weak fist.

“It's four in the afternoon.”

Your heart sinks at the sound of his voice; flat, toneless, but easily recognizable.

“Kankri? Fuck me, I thought you left for the night and tomor- today to hang with some college buddies.”

“I returned early because I received a text that informed me of your... illegal activities.”

Wow. Who the fuck told him you were drinking? If John ratted you again you'll string him on the school flagpole by his fallopian tubes. You have your eyes covered by your arm, groaning at the fact of being awake, if nothing else. Your head is pounding, and you couldn't be happier that he shut off that fucking alarm.

“It was my birthday, I wanted to have some fun, alright? I'm sorry.”

“You promised.”

Your heart's in your throat. You did promise. Fuck.

“I'm sorry.”

“Don't be sorry. Be better.” His steps are quiet as he gets up and walks upstairs, and you can hear the front door open and close again.

You don't want to get up. Not yet.

 


	5. Here's Hoping; Take a Chance!

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> It's literally been two years since I last updated this and I could not be more sorry. I will be continuing this story to its end; I've sat down over the last month or so and hashed out the most of the exact events for each chapter to come.  
> Thank you for being patient!

 When you finally get the strength to stand up without feeling nauseous and exhausted to the point of passing out and drowning yourself in your own vomit, you get up and turn on the coffee maker in the tiny kitchen down here. You just lean on the counter, head in your hands and elbow nearly slipping into the sink. You don't want to look around, you know it'll be a mess; you just want to go to your bed and pretend the few stragglers that weren't roused by Kankri's alarm aren't there, and that will be a reality once you do get up. Sighing, you double check to make sure you put your expensive sleep-inducing coffee grounds in the filter, because as far as you're concerned that'll help you sober up as well as sleep off this stupidly ill feeling.

By the time the coffee is done, you've nearly fallen asleep on the counter twice, and suddenly you regret making a full pot rather than a few cups, or even half a pot at the most. You pour yourself a mug and notice when you look down that you seem to be missing your shirt. You make a mental note to avoid Facebook for at least the next three days; you know exactly what will be there, unfortunately. Hesitantly, you put the rest of the coffee back in the machine. You figure it'll be gone by the time you get up again, and the thought of wasting expensive coffee makes you growl under your breath.

Adding your milk and a few extra spoonfuls of sugar, you stir it and carry it, spoon and all, back to your room, making sure to keep your eyes on your door and nothing else. Plopping on your bed and taking a big drink, you set your coffee aside and check your phone to discover a few snapchats. The first one is Terezi, and the rest are Dave. Oh, boy.

The one from Terezi makes you choke on your next sip of coffee, sputtering before gathering yourself again and swallowing it. It appears to be a photo sent last night, of her kissing just below the head of a dick with cum over her lips and nose and chin. You barely grab a screenshot before the timer runs out, studying it more closely until you confirm that, yes, that's your schlong. The events surrounding that picture come flooding back and you drag your hand down your face, hesitantly switching to see the snapchats from Dave. They're the usual during-slash-after some sort of party; him with a beer bong, leaning back to pour something in his mouth keg-style, and so on. The last one makes you laugh. It's a picture of him grinding on Jade with a thumbs-up, captioned, "you got her i can have jade right" at the bottom. You promptly snap him your middle finger with the caption "WHO'S 'HER'?" to see what his response is.

The photo you get in response a minute later is of his face in the shower, his bright red eyes half lidded with one brow cocked up and the other scrunched down. You screenshot it, just for the sake of having a picture of his eyes; he can't really show them much because it doesn't take a lot of light to fry his retinas. It's only a few seconds before you get a text instead.

 

 

dude why did you screencap that  
YOUR EYES ARE BEAUTIFUL  
wtf  
why does everyone and their mom have a massive throbbing erection for my sweet peepers  
youre fucked dude  
youre all fucked  
fuck  
WHO DID YOU MEAN?  
do you not know who else got that snap  
WHAT  
WHAT SNAP  
the one with your dick in it dumbass  
?????  
ok look i get your stupid play dumb fail safe in case im bluffing but tz sent me the pic  
shes got your nasty on her face ill fucking send you the cap of it to prove it  
WHATEVER I GOT IT  
yeah now you remember you shit  
so did you have fun  
A GENTLEMAN DOESN'T TELL  
a gentleman doesnt blow his load all over a single chicks face and let it get sent to her ex  
WAIT HOLD UP ARE YOU ACTUALLY FUCKING MAD AT ME?  
YOU'VE BEEN BROKEN UP FOR FUCKING MONTHS  
what no  
its chill everybodys friends relax broski  
just wanted to get your thoughts on your first(?) bj  
10/10 WOULD DO AGAIN  
lmao  
it only goes up from here hombre  
so you gonna ask her out  
I DON'T KNOW.  
I DON'T EVEN KNOW IF SHE'D WANT ME TO?  
SHOULD I?  
well that depends  
the public matter aint shit because everyone thinks youre dating anyway  
so its just a matter of whether you want more sex or not  
WHAT.  
I DON'T GIVE A FLYING, ROTTING SPHERE OF FERMENTED HUMAN WASTE ABOUT SEX  
I ACTUALLY FUCKING CARE ABOUT HER  
so would you turn her down if she wanted to do the do  
UM  
IF SHE WANTS TO THEN I MEAN? YEAH I'LL PROBABLY BE DOWN  
BUT YOU'RE MAKING IT SOUND LIKE I'M GONNA FUCKING USE HER FOR SEX  
YOU AND I BOTH KNOW THAT IT'D HURT ME TO DO THAT MORE THAN IT'D HURT HER  
THERE'S A LITERAL NEGATIVE NUMBER OF REASONS FOR ME TO USE HER LIKE THAT  
cool  
you passed  
ARE YOU FUCKING KIDDING ME  
IF YOU'RE GONNA PLAY SOME BULLSHIT GATEKEEPER EX I MIGHT AS WELL JUST BEAT THE SHIT OUT OF YOU LIKE THAT MAD SEVEN EVIL EXES THING  
ew god no that was awful  
no thanks  
just making sure you dont have a taste for human blood now you feel  
shit can seriously become addictive  
man im not out for your head ok relax  
im trying to lighten this up  
you know she really likes you  
THEN WHY HASN'T SHE MADE A MOVE?  
LIKE. RELATIONSHIP WISE  
she thought youd want to  
youre a sucker for that romance crap  
she said she thought you were gonna give her flowers and take her to the movies a bunch of times  
pull that cliché arm over her shoulders thing  
kiss her when the big kiss comes up  
drive her home and ask her to be yours on her doorstep  
she got super quiet and smiley it was kinda gross tbh  
but now i think you have to do that oops  
karkat  
bro  
broski  
bruh  
brosephino  
broseidon  
dude where did you go  
did you get a romance boner  
a heart on  
an affection erection  
god that joke is so old  
seriously dude real talk  
uuuggGGGHHHHHHHH KARKAT  
FINE ill talk to you later i need to finish my shower 

 

 

You've stopped reading his texts, thinking in your head about that scenario playing out. He's definitely not wrong; you'd love to do that for her, to do that with her. You probably would have already, had you not thought she wasn't interested. Honestly it's something you think about a lot; being able to hold her hand in public, kissing her cheek just because you want to, and letting your arm rest over her shoulders so you can hold her close and just close your eyes, just drink her scent. On the other hand, you've always been too nervous to do anything like that, as you feel guilty about doing that sort of thing with someone you're not in a relationship with. Call it superstition though you may, it's no more than you being a big, dumb, overly romantic sap.

You run it over in your head a few times, then text Terezi.

 

 

HEY.  
GOOD MORN1NG >:]  
IT'S LIKE SIX PM.  
Y34H, MORN1NG  
COOL. WHAT'S UP?  
1 W4S JUST TH1NK1NG 4BOUT YOU 4CTU4LLY  
YEAH?  
Y34H  
1 W4S TH1NK1NG 4BOUT YOU J3RK1NG OFF TO TH4T SN4P YOU SCR33NSHOTT3D >;]  
WELL  
I MEAN.  
I COULD?  
H4H4H4H4H4  
WHAT  
TH4T WOULD B3 R34LLY CUT3  
CUTE.  
Y34H, JUST L1K3 1 LOOK CUT3 W1TH YOUR J1ZZ ON MY F4C3  
TEREZI. MAN  
WHAT THE HELL  
YOU DON'T NEED TO BLOW A GUY TO LOOK CUTE  
SO 1 D1DN'T LOOK CUT3? >:'[  
WELL. YOU DID?  
IN THAT FETISHIZED SORT OF WAY.  
>:]  
OK SO OFF THAT  
DO YOU WANT TO GO SEE A MOVIE TOMORROW?  
>:O  
Y3S!  
TH3 D4NC3 WORK3D!  
WHAT? NO, I WOULD HAVE ASKED YOU ANYWAY  
I JUST DIDN'T KNOW YOU WOULD BE INTERESTED  
LIKE. AT ALL.  
W3LL 1 4M!  
YEAH THANKS FOR THE NEWS FLASH PAPER BOY.  
3XTR4, 3XTR4  
HA.  
>:]]]  
(:B  
CUT3.  
NAH.

  

 

You can see that she's typing a reply, but you instinctively lock your phone when you hear a knock on your door. Wiping away your dumb grin and forcing down the red flush from your face, you get up and open the door, pouting as soon as you're met at eye level with a very prominent collarbone. When you look up, there's a generally flat expression on his face, yet a little gleam in his multicolored eyes. It's enough to make you want to jab him in the gut for seeming smug, because you know he can tell you're hungover as hell from just looking at you. Fuckin' Captor.

“What?” You demand, not bothering to keep eye contact, and instead rubbing your eyes and pretending like he woke you up. He cocks a brow at you and nods his head toward the stairs.

“Mom and Dad said Kankri was fucking choked earlier. What happened?” You want to get mad at him for asking something like that, because he knows very well that you and your brother have a very complicated relationship, but his mild little lisp snags your anger and drags it away. Again. Damn it. Instead, you rub your hand down your face.

“Nothing, don't worry about it.” Of course, you can see his brows furrow with worry. This boy will be the end of you. However, he shrugs, and doesn't really pry beyond that.

“... Yeah, alright. Just. Talk to me if you need to.” That's what Sollux says. All you heard was 'You're full of shit, let me know when you're done being stubborn and want to cry on my shoulder because you fucked up again.' Ugh.

“Thanks.”

With that, he nods and turns around, heading back upstairs. You sigh, and close the door again, walking back to flop down on your bed. You pick up your phone, and as you do, your anger at Sollux starts to bubble back up, and so does anger for your fucking snitch of a 'friend;' especially now that you've been reminded of what happened before you napped on the floor a few hours ago. He's in for it now.

 

 

EGBERT.  
vantas?  
YOU SLIMY, SNOT-NOSED, LITTLE FUCKING BRAT.  
:B  
WIPE THAT SHITTY TOOTHY GRIN OFF YOUR SHITTY TOOTHY FACE.  
YOU'RE FUCKED, KID.  
i'm a year older than you.  
FUCK OFF  
FUCK ! OFF !!!  
WHAT THE FUCKING ACTUAL COCK-BLISTERING HELL IS WRONG WITH YOU  
WHY DO YOU FEEL THE NEED TO STICK YOUR BROWNASS FUCKING NOSE IN MY SHIT  
MY PERSONAL BUSINESS IS, OH! YOU'LL NEVER BELIEVE IT!  
MINE.  
STOP SNITCHING ON ME, YOU COCKSUCKING RAT  
YOU FILTHY FUCKING SQUEAKER  
whoa, man, you need to chill.  
i don't even really know what you're talking about?  
BULLSHIT.  
IT WAS MY FUCKING BIRTHDAY  
SO I HAD SOME DRINKS  
oh.  
AND YOU DECIDED TO FUCK THE REST OF MY WEEK IN ITS NEAREST GAPING ORIFICE  
karkat.  
WHAT THE FUCK IS WRONG WITH YOU MAN???  
THIS IS LIKE THE SIXTH TIME YOU'VE PULLED SOMETHING LIKE THIS.  
karkat oh my god.  
he pried at me last night, i was smashed.  
it's so fucking hard for me to lie, you know that better than a lot of people.  
GO FUCK YOURSELF.  
I'M ON THE SHITLIST AND NOW YOU'RE ON MINE.  
YOU BETTER FUCKING WATCH YOUR NARC ASS.  
holy shit, chill.  
FINAL WARNING MOTHERFUCKER.

 

  

You're fuming at this point; red in the face and white-knuckled hands gripping your phone so hard that the crack in the screen extends another two inches, to the other side of the frame. This causes you to swear loudly and chuck you electronic at the wall on the other side of your room, effectively busting the drywall. Similarly, this only serves the rip another curse from your fiery lungs before you go take it out of the new hole in your wall.

Sitting back down on your bed, you crack your neck and your fingers, wiggling your frame in a fluid motion afterward to try and calm yourself down. It works (a bit, anyway), and you slump forward, then fall back on your mattress, and close your eyes. Your phone buzzes in your hand, but your ignore it, feeling that expensive coffee of yours kick in and start to let you drift off. Actually, you think, it was probably your anger spike, because you usually either pass out or feel exhausted after those. You don't get to finish the thought, however, as you've fallen back to sleep before you could. 

 

* * *

  

It's eight twenty-four PM, and you've spent your day today by getting up early and helping your friend's parents with chores around the house.

You worked literally non-stop for nine hours, taking care of everything you could so that you could greet Hannah and Glen at the door with a huge grin, and even bigger sweat marks under your arms and down your back. They eyed you curiously, and when you took their coats to hang them up, Sollux called you a kiss-ass when he passed on the way to the kitchen. You stuck your tongue out at him and continued your business, and eventually made your way back to Glen while he was getting supper started with the dishes you had just washed. You helped him out, idly responding as he told you how his day at work was, and when he finally asked you what you wanted, you spilled, asking to borrow his car to go to the movies. With a shrug, he reached in his pocket and placed the keys on your head, chuckling and shaking his head and telling you to enjoy yourself. You gave him a quick hug and took off to go shower, then back upstairs to book it out the door. You heard Sollux yell about how he never gets the car on your way out; it made your 'victory' all the sweeter.

Now, you're looking around, checking your phone every few seconds, tugging at the collar of your shirt, and idly fumbling your thumbs around with taps on the screen. You carefully parked your sort-of-dad's car in the parking lot, about six spaces back from the sidewalk in front of the theater. Click the lock button on your phone again. Still no text. You'd begin to worry if you didn't know better, but you know better and you know her and you know there's nothing to worry about. As if right on cue to make sure you give yourself a big ol' 'I told you so,' you told you so, Terezi's appeared beside you. She's grinning and wearing a tiered tanktop-dress, jeans underneath and some of her hair pulled back in a small ponytail while the rest seems to be crimped. 

“I hope you already bought our tickets if you think you've got time to stand there and gawk at me, /sweetheart/.” She's lost a bit of her grin, but it's easy to tell she's still just joking. You blink away your daze, flash the tickets, and nudge her, holding your arm like that for her to rest her hand on, super formal style. She laughs gently and does just that, letting you guide her inside. You love her laugh.

“I want good seats, snacks can wait."

“What? No, if we wait the lines will take forever.”  
  
“Then I'll go grab a seat for myself, you can sit in the shitrow.”

 “You don't want popcorn then? What about a soda.”

 “I have water.”

 “You're bluffing, go grab us a pair of seats and I'll bring you snacks.”

 “Large cup mixed half and half with red Fruitopia and Sprite.”

 “Fruit punch or watermelon?”

 “Red Fruitopia!”

 “Of course, how ridiculous of me.”

 After the surprisingly quick-winded exchange, she gives you a quick peck on your cheek before scooting off to the theater room, making sure to step in a tiny puddle she spotted and squeak her red converse before continuing on her way. You love her strange habits.

“Next,” your attention is forced toward, instead, the clerk at the snack counter. Stepping forward, you briskly make your order, and he looks relieved to have a customer who doesn't spend an hour deciding what they want, or doesn't try to make him accept an expired coupon. It's a matter of three minutes and you've got your order, looking behind you and confirming that, yes, if you had gone to get seats first the lines would have spiked. Karkat one, Terezi... is probably still winning, you decide.

The trip to the theater room is cut short when you're met with an impatient shout and shuffling of feet, followed by a cackle. She takes the drink from you and leaves you with the popcorn, taking a large sip and waiting for you in the doorway.

“Hurry up! Check this out!” You follow with a bit more of a kick in your step, tracing the dimly lit path into the cinema. Empty. You deflate just a bit, turning your head back to Terezi to find her beaming.

“My city now,” she boldly claims, setting her drink in the nearest armrest and running up the stairs to the top row, then jumping seats all the way to the middle, where she plops down and sets her feet up on the seat in front of her. A smile has spread itself across your face; you've never been in an empty theater before, and you'd be lying if you said you weren't excited. You take a second to pick up her drink before heading up to join her. The exact two middle seats, if you hadn't already been in love you for sure would have been by now.

The room fills up a bit more before the movie starts, to about half, would be your guess. Not able to remember the name, the basic pot was comedy with a little romance that was surprisingly not unnecessary at all. About a pair of sisters that go to their childhood house that's just been sold by their parents, so,logically they throw a huge party and the romantic interest gets a music box up his ass. You could tell Terezi was enjoying herself nearly the whole time; this is super her sense of humor. Of course, at the end, the couple gets together and that's when you start to tear up, despite the predictability and lack of it actually being all that romantic. You immediately receive shit for your watery physical response.

When the credits roll, you stay to watch the obligatory bloopers, but your popcorn is long gone and your drink more than empty, so neither of you hesitate much to leave when they're done.

Giggling and making a constant stream of references in no particular order on your way out, trash disposed of and cackling into the parking lot. You unlock it with the remote, hopping in the driver's seat and closing your door. You move to roll down the window for your farewells, but the door on the passenger side slams shut as well, making you whip your head around.

“Ter- Yeah? Am I driving you home?”

“Uh, yeah? It's not your birthday anymore, back to catering to me. Chop, chop, while I'm young.”

“Alright, alright.” You shake your head and lock the doors again, putting the keys in the ignition and starting it up. Carefully backing out, you start on your way. The drive itself is smooth, not too much traffic, and the quotes continue without pause. These nights are great, driving and taking the long way around to drop her off while you laugh and carry on. You've done this a few times since you got your license, but most of those times Dave or Sollux or both were there too. Everyone laughs harder with more people around, but it can sometimes be better when it's just the two of you.

Your train of thought is cut short when you pull up to her house, letting the engine idle.

“Pull ahead a bit,” she states, as if a fact instead of a request. “My mom's vicious, I swear she's like a dragon.” You chuckle a bit and comply,pulling ahead about five-ish feet. Driving it into park, you turn back to her.

“That better?”

“Perfect.”

At the same time, you both shift and start to tip forward. Your face flushes red and she grins, though you both stop. Clearing your throat, you lean back again, lowering your eyes to her hand resting on her thigh.

“So... so, uh, Terezi?” She chirps a tiny 'hm?' in response.

“Do you... I mean, would you be opposed, um,” your throat dries. “Maybe want to? Make things official... Like. Date, do you want to go out with me?” The last bit is rushed, and when you glance up for a fraction of a second, she's grinning expectantly.

“Hmm...” She falsely ponders. When you look up again, she leans forward just a bit more and on an impulse, you close the gap between you. Your eyes are screwed shut and your heart is pounding, you can't even focus enough to move your lips from the awkward pucker they have. She lets out a small sound, relaxing and tilting her head just so to melt into the kiss. It feels blistering hot, and you can't hear anything but your pulse, until a roar of Terezi's name sounds from the front door of her house. You both know she can't see you but, instinctively, you jerk away from each other, and you clear your throat, sitting upright in your seat and starring out the windshield.

“I'll think about it,” she chortles, hopping out of the car and shouting a response to her mother.

You let out a breath you didn't know you were holding, and pull away, on your way home.

 

* * *

 

Once home, you carefully park the car and head inside, placing the keys in the dish by the door and shitting it behind you. Kicking off your shoes, you shuffle downstairs with a bottle of water from the fridge, and pull out your phone to turn it back on. You hadn't yet had the chance, since you'd been driving right after the movie.

A few texts, a solid two from Terezi and some from Eridan. Oh boy, what does he want.

 

 

hey kar  
kar  
kar cmon i need to ask ya somethin  
wwtf  
shit i need a neww phone  
DO YOU ACTUALLY STILL HAVE THAT PHONE WITH PHYSICAL BUTTONS  
yes  
YOU'RE GROSS.  
kar wwtf wwhere did that come from  
MY ASS.  
eww  
WHAT DID YOU WANT TO ASK ME  
i need ya to tell me wwhere ter is  
SHE'S ?? AT HER HOUSE ????  
wwhat really  
wwait wwhere wwere you  
YIKES IT'S LIKE YOU'RE PICKING SHITTY WORDS ON PURPOSE.  
YES REALLY? AND WE WENT TO THE MOVIES, I JUST DROPPED HER OFF  
wwhat the FUCK  
at least that makes sense i wwas tryin to text both a you  
YES ERIDAN, I CAN SEE THAT.  
ugh shut UP i dont need your fuckin sass  
YOU TEXTED ME? WHY DO YOU NEED TO KNOW WHERE SHE IS ANYWAY  
because she owwes me money  
AGAIN.  
again  
FUCK DUDE.  
also sol still has my number blocked so i coudlnt ask him or nothin  
LMAO HE NEVER HAD YOUR NUMBER BLOCKED YOU KNOW THAT RIGHT  
WWHAT  
YEAH HE LITERALLY IGNORES YOU  
I FUCKIN USE HIS NUMBER AS A MEMO PAD ARE YOU SERIOUS HES BEEN GETTIN ALL THOSE TEXTS  
YOU USE HIS NUMBER FOR A MEMO PAD HOLY SHIT ARE YOU FOR REAL  
THAT IS HILARIOUS THAT IS G O L D E N  
HAHAHA SHIT THAT'S THE BEST THING I'VE HEARD ALL MONTH THAT'S SO GREAT  
KAR FUCK OFF  
NO WAY  
I'M GOING TO ASK HIM TO SEE THOSE RIGHT NOW THIS IS AWESOME  
YOU'RE A FUCKING LOSER, DUDE.  
im goin to bed  
NICE.  
DON'T FORGET YOUR SLEEP MEDS.  
LOOKS LIKE YOU PICKED THEM UP ON THE FOURTEENTH.  
GOODNIGHT  
HAHAHAHAHA

 

  

You're sitting in Sollux's room with him on his bed now, taking turns reading out the memo texts and laughing at them. It's not necessarily something to mock, just a good joke between the three of you at the expense of the rich dickbag. He's just too mockable.

After a few more minutes you manage to convince Sollux to help you tidy up the remaining mess in the basement. A few stray cans and bottles, some streamers, and Dave left his DJ equipment because his brother's car broke down just out of your driveway. Luckily Sollux knows how to pack it up properly and stack it in the corner.

You can't help but to notice Kankri's door is firmly shut, especially when it opens a crack before shutting again, immediately and silently. It makes your heart sink. It's so upsetting to know he's mad at you, even worse when he's so passive about it. Uncomfortable, and unsettling, you've decided are the words you'd use.

Tidied up now, you finally respond to Terezi's good night text, glad it doesn't seem like her mom skinned her alive. You're in your pajamas, sitting on your bed; you set your phone to charge on your night stand and turn off the lamp, taking one more drink of water. Laying down, it's not long before you slip into sleep.


End file.
